Why Grieve or Worry?

This is a reminder for me and anyone who reads it...

HAVE YOU EVER HEARD THAT GRIEF BRINGS BACK WHAT HAS BEEN LOST, OR THAT WORRY CORRECTS MISTAKES? SO WHY GRIEVE AND WORRY THEN?

We often grieve about things that are already said and done. We too always worry about things that are done in hoping for the best things to happen. Why do we need to grieve and worry? And why do we need to think so much about something when we have done our best in making an effort for that something? And clearly, as the quote above suggests, grieve and worry always brings you nowhere.

I don't know about other people, but I am the worry-type person. I think so much about something that I tend to worry and worry. But I realize that it cannot do anything for me at that time. But what i realize it could do is that when I think so much about this something, the outcome would be much smoother. In other words, I have thought so much about it and preparing myself to face the worst situation, and as a result, i end up doing okay in such thing.

I was so worried thinking about interviews and thus i prepared for them. And in the end, i went through it. Everything is just like that. I think about something. I worry. Then I get myself prepared. Finally, i do okay, Alhamdulillah. But the thing with this quote to me, personally is that it means to just worry and worry after we have worked hard to attain a particular achievement. And while waiting for the results, we worry. This is probably useless. Why? Because...the thing is over. Completely over. So why should we grieve or worry about something that we cannot correct anymore. All we could do is just pray and tawakkal, right? Unless we could do something about it, or we could somehow grab this super power to turn back time, then, probably grieving and worrying might be somewhat useful. That is completely NONSENSE!

Whatever it is, I really want to work my way out of this worrying stuff. I hate being worried. And i get stressed out when i worry a lot. And even if it does make me prepare for the worst situation, I should not let myself worry so much since whatever it is that i'm heading towards is already fixed by Allah. I mean it's okay to worry a bit to just get the gist of initiating an effort, but too much would do me crazy. And above all, shouldn't i always think for the best and think about the best instead of always thinking about the negative side...i think this quote best explains what i'm trying to say;):

DO NOT EXPECT TRIALS AND CALAMITIES, RATHER EXPECT PEACE AND SAFETY AND GOOD HEALTH, IF ALLAH WILLS

But this does not at all mean that we could just sit down and pray & only think about the best that could happen without even trying to accomplish a dream. It's after working so hard for something that we should "not expect trials and calamities" but should keep praying for "peace, safety, and good health" inshaAllah. =)

Wallahua'lam

**the two quotations were kidnapped from someone's email:p**

kenduri kawen;p

Bismillah..

I just wanted to write something about an interesting stuff i encountered today..I was at this wedding 'kenduri' with my sister. It was her friend's wedding and so we went to Kelab Shah Alam (i think?). When we arrived, my sister parked behind this lorry and we walked a little distance up the hill; suddenly my sister realized she lost her anklet. We then walked back along the path and i found it!;)
Okay that was not the point of writing. Anyways, after greeting the couples' parents, we went in the hall and wow! the bridegroom was just like him;p...i told my sister and she agreed with me up to the max. I couldn't stop looking at him but at the same time i told myself not to coz he's somebody's husband (!). And even if he weren't someone's husband, it'd still be wrong to look at him more than once. hiks. whatever it is, i really hope to get married with him=) (of course NOT the bridegroom la!, hihi)

i'm so glad to have Allah put my life story this way, despite the long journey of ups and downs, coz for the first time i just feel so much cared about even though we don't have all this mushy mushy stuff..and for the first time i feel that everything i want just blends in with what he wants. i have never felt much more understood by a guy and i'm so happy that our mission in life are just the same. and the most important thing is, the first time we met after a year knowing each other just felt so easy and unplanned and my heart just felt so calm seeing his face. it just seems like we've known each other for years. thank you (if you ever read this), for the kindness that you possess, the patience that you have in always dealing with me, the calmness you bring into my life every time i get overwhelmed with problems, the advices you give without giving up and most importantly, your sincerity in just accepting me the way i am and seeing my weaknesses as my strengths....all i hope is just that Allah answers my prayers and all that i have ever wanted in this life in being His full time slave;)amiin

some things just cannot go my way...

Bismillah,
Alhamdulillah things are back to normal again..But some things are just unchangeable...especially when it comes to my emotional needs. Okay, i don't want to start complaining. Everything is just temporary and so are all the bad feelings that are kept inside. Sometimes it's just not worth to talk about how i feel especially when people just won't understand me. And that shows that Allah wants me to talk to Him, and tell Him all my miseries and problems. Afterall, only He could help me settle all those stuff banging inside my head. Honestly, problems that i'm facing are just little little ones at the moment, compared to other people who are less fortunate. And I thank Allah for everything that i own and possess all this while. The problem is just that I think far too much from what i should. That's what's making me all haywire sometimes. Seriously, things are just too easy to put under control. It's whether I want to or not. It's all in my hands, as long as Allah lets me do them. And again, I really thank Him for letting me go through all this stuff coz it makes me a much mature person and in reality, He makes me realize how things in life are just unavoidable sometimes and the only way to solve problems is through compromising. Even though most of the time compromising seems too hard, it's always the easiest solution, as long as i can be patient with what i'm going through. Maybe i'm not yet on my way to face the real world, but i'm sure i'm ready to face any challenges that will come. All i need is a whole lot of faith, a little confidence, a bucket of support, and a pinch of trust.

Tawakkal

Bismillah..

I've been sitting at home for nearly a month now and i'm still hoping for something that is clearly suitable for me..and I keep reminding myself that there will always be something for me as long as i have some effort and at t he same time keep praying. Okay, enough of my babbles.

The concept of tawakkal is probably the most important thing that someone should learn to live peacefully on earth. If we realize how temporary this world is and how we should really obey Allah's rules, we will notice that the concept of tawakkal will keep us straight on His path. Sometimes we've worked so hard to gain something that we want without realizing that everything is already written for us even before we were born. And at that exact time where we fail to accomplish to reach our goals and desires, we feel apalled and stressed out, as though there is nothing else that could be done. This might lead us to feel like life is not on our side and even worse, we would feel that life is never fair. However, if we think positively, in terms of how Allah had created us, we would never feel this way. If we realize that we are only His slaves on earth, we would only do what is told and avoid ourselves from all the things He prohibits us to do. This is never easy. But if we could bow down and kneel to him, at the same time feel that there is nothing greater than Him, this process becomes something easier to do, as long as we practice it throughout our daily lives. I just read in a friends blog about something related to this kneeling process to Allah-she quoted that as human being we must face problems and these problems run from our head to our knees...and when we kneel down to Allah, our problems will slowly be solved as we get closer to Allah. And again, I'd like to quote something that she always writes in her blog : it doesn't take a genius to see and feel all this. It only needs someone who can actually realize how small and insignificant everything in this world is besides our imaan. If we can strive to be this kind of person, I would say 99% of the current global issues can be resolved. However, the ambiguity that lies in all aspects of human life blurs out the significance of reality. People are too busy thinking and planning for their future, their health, their beings in the future that they fail to rationalize that there is ONE being that is also planning; in fact, He has already planned it ages ago when we don't even know it. We as His slaves should take a step backwards and think about this thoroughly. I personally feel that the world is going too fast especially when I am outside and seeing people in the working life. People are getting too busy with their own work and thinking about themselves and what's going to happen next. But we actually need to always remind ourselves where those things are going to bring us. When every little thing happens to us, we should stop for a moment and think why this is happening. We need to put our egoistic selves aside and see if these things are happening because of our own weaknesses or others. And for sure, people will definitely, (and always) point their fingers to other people. Why does this happen? I guess 90% of it comes from the zero level of tawakkal in our hearts: A person who has full sincerity towards Allah and acts only for the sake of Allah will definitely (and easily) obtain this concept of tawakkal. They will never point to others' faults nor will they complain and complain every time something doesn't go their way. Yes, they will certainly work hard to achieve something they really want badly, but if that thing is not on their side, they understand that it is a sign from Allah that this something is just not for them. But no, they never complain. They accept it freely without feeling regretful or angry. It is undeniable that sometimes we will feel sad, but the sad feeling will not lead is to feeling lost or hopeless, if we are the true believers. Think about it, and think deeply. This is just a reminder for myself and whoever gets the opportunity to read this. Just a quick note from the Quran in surah at-Talaq, Allah already reminded us about the concept of tawakkal, and here goes:

And for those who fear Allah, He (ever) prepares a way out (2) And He provides for him from (sources) he never could imagine. And if anyone puts his trust in Allah, sufficient is (Allah) for him. For Allah will surely accomplish His purpose: verily, for all things has Allah appointed a due proportion. (3)

Wallahua'lam

some views are just unacceptable.

Bismillah...

yesterday i was at this event called "Hijab for a day"..the event was part of the Islam Awareness Week organized by the MSA..well it was disappointing to see not many people come...and even the MC said the number of people present was not up to MSA's expectation. Well...it came to be that they changed it to a sort of a group discussion...so the panels talked and gave their introductory statements..and the first three were fine...views about how I myself feel about wearing hijab...however, the fourth panel said something different. VERY DIFFERENT. At least in my view.

She said she did a lot of research about why we Muslims had to wear the hijab..and somehow for years after doing the research, she felt from her perspective that there is not any any statement to judge and say firmly that it's compulsory to put on a hijab. WHAT? The shout in my heart almost came out from my mouth. But I managed to calm down a bit and tried to view it positively. POSITIVELY? HOW? Isn't what she said contradictory to the real teachings of ISLAM? definitely YES.

Well as she talked and talked about her experiences, it could be understood that it was quite a challenge for her being brought up in the US having to deal with people pulling off her hijab..making people curious about why she had to wear it. BUT, I don't think there's any way people could just make assumptions to whether it is compulsory or not. It is just so clear that wearing a hijab is COMPULSORY. Honestly, i've seen all these things happen. Sometimes, it is for sure a challenging thing to do especially when you are not in a Muslim country. I myself have gone through such episodes where people are curious to know what's inside the hijab and even have experienced drunk people asking me whether I'm bald. To me, every single part of my everyday life doesn't happen for no reason. I'm sure that Allah has given permission for it to happen. If not, it will never happen. So when I think this way, I take it as a challenge for myself, but at the same time, I know it is probably as a test that Allah wants to give me. I know I'm just talking about having to live here for 4 years compared to her experience living in the US for all her life. BUT, wouldn't it be the greatest sacrifice to do something for the sake of Allah and ignoring how other people view you? Isn't Allah's view towards you the most important thing in this world?

I just can't accept the view. I'm not allowing my pessimism to conquer my rational nature. Neither am I being too closed minded about this thing. To put it in simple words, it is just Allah's Command. Full stop.

How can she say that she feels much more comfortable having times where she wears the hijab. And gladly say that sometimes people would see her without the hijab on campus. How can this on-and-off thing show the function of the hijab? Today she covers and people don't know what the covered parts look like. And tomorrow, she uncovers, letting everyone see her supposed-to-be-covered parts. It just doesn't make sense of how the hijab is supposed to function.

Whatever it is, I hope I'm not the only one feeling this way. I did definitely see a few weird faces after listening to what she had to say. And I hope those weird faces did mean "how could she say this?!" And the worst thing is just the views of non-Muslim people present in the event. Wouldn't they feel that how could all these rules be interpreted differently---even contradictorily and especially about wearing hijab. I know that there will always be a khilaf in almost any rules in Islam...but it doesn't come up to the extent to say that the Quran didn't make wearing the hijab something compulsory. I will inshaAllah be firm with my views and not taking all this as something I should accept just because she's the advisor of the MSA! only Allah knows.

post-Real Estate-exam

Bismillah..

Hari ini aku selesai 'midterm Real Estate' setelah bertungkus lumus menelaah semuanya..terima kasih ya Allah kerana menemaniku sentiasa...walau kerisauan menggunung tinggi, ku tetap berserah dan bertawakkal kepadaMu...aku telahpun berusaha untuk semua...dan aku terlalu bersyukur dengan apa yang ada...apalah daya diri ini untuk mengatasi takdirMu...jika sememangnya baik untukku, pasti akan Engkau hadiahkan keputusan yang cemerlang. Seandainya bukan milikku kemenangan kali ini, janganlah Engkau wujudkan rasa kekecewaan yang tidak berakhir...aku sedar, dalam apa jua sekali pun perlakuan manusia, semuanya akan kembali berkait denganMu...tidak ada satu pun yang terjadi tanpa ada signifikan yang membuatku akan terfikirkanMu...setiap apa yang aku lalui, pasti aku sedar bahawa ia adalah dariMu...terutamanya bila aku menghadapi peperiksaan...aku gentar. dan aku pasti akan kelam kabut memikirkan bagaimana jika aku gagal. Tetapi adakah aku berfikir sedahsyat itu apabila mengharungi ujian dariMu? bukankah aku sepatutnya lebih mahu berjaya dalam ujian 'hidup' yang Engkau berikan selama ini...aku sedar, segala markah2 ujian dan peperiksaan di sekolah, kolej, dan universiti hanyalah sebagai jalan cerita. Memanglah ia penting untuk mendapat pekerjaan dan sebagainya..namun apakah erti berjaya mendapat 90++ dlm peperiksaan tetapi tidak dapat bersyukur..apakah ertinya berjaya mendapat markah paling tinggi tetapi tidak dapat mengaitkan rahmatMu yang ada di sebalik kejayaan itu...apakah ertinya kejayaan itu tanpa ada pengorbanan semata-mata keranaMu?

Dahulu...aku sering belajar kerana mahukan keputusan yang cemerlang. Namun kini, setelah Engkau berikanku kesedaran, aku masih berusaha dalam mencari ilmu, dan aku masih bertungkus lumus menelaah pelajaran..namun, niatku telah berubah sama sekali. Aku menjadi yakin bahawa jika aku berusaha keranaMu, pasti akan ku kecapi kejayaan. Kejayaan itu bukan bererti kejayaan dalam masa terdekat semata-mata..tetapi kejayaan yang ku harapkan ini adalah kejayaan di akhirat nanti..Kini, aku sentiasa pasrah terhadap apa sahaja yang terjadi, walau kadangkala terbit rasa kecewa di hati. Maksud Islam itu sendiri adalah menyerah diri pada yang Esa..jadi...bukankan menjadi kewajipan untukku sentiasa terima apa sahaja yang Engkau tetapkan...

aku kan sentiasa menerima dengan redha..apa sahaja yang Engkau tetapkan buatku...tetapi tunjukkanlah bagiku jalan yang lurus..dan janganlah Engkau pesongkan jalan itu, sesudah Engkau luruskan untukku....amiin

di manakah aku sebenarnya...?